“He escorted his girls and changed their shoes from flats to heels. I think that is significant. That’s a huge step for daughters growing up and who better to head them into that stage of their life other than there dad.” ~Sharon Leonard
The above photo is of my first cousin, Marvin Leonard and his daughter. He is my hero!
When I look at this photo my mind quickly rushes back to happier times. Times when family meant cousins were best friends. Aunts and uncles were concerned with your welfare and grandparents loved you more than your parents.
When I look at this photo I just don’t see a season father, but I’m reminded of his giggles, and laughter and the responses of his tattling. Also, as I looking upon this wonderful photo I’m reminded of the moment I felt family prided as he stood before me in his Army uniform. I saw the boy and man roll into one. It was wonderful to see his stature stating he was ready to defend America and the American people. And, today, as his wife posted nothing but sentiments of love for the man she married, again I found myself filled with family prided.
It’s great to know my cousin got marriage and parenting responsibility right! Love you, Pom!
Well, Lord, I have finally gotten up from the couch. Mostly because your spirit has urged me to write a pray.
But, Lord, I feel torn about what I should pray. There are so many life situations that need your help. So, again, I feel torn about what I should pray about. However the situation that seems to be heaviest on my heart is the spiritual and cancerous choice of Americans.
The choice to remove you from our country is drowning this wonderful nation in the pool of political correctness; thus, giving birth to spiritual chaos.
We have taken you out of everything! We have taken you out of our governmental institutions, our business, our schools, our churches, our homes, our children, our families and our daily actions. And because we have taken you out of everything we are now experiencing the following: high unemployment, high divorce rates, high rate of children born out-of-wedlock, high rates of child exploitation’s, extreme amounts of mental illness, and people having disregards for life.
Sadly, Lord, as we the American people bicker over small things such as who should or should not get married. Or should the NRA step in and help make stiffer laws for obtaining firearms! Or if a black man is making good or bad choices up on Capitol Hill! Lord, the country that I love is quickly falling into a perilous state.
Lord the catalyst for what is happening in America is our ease in removing you from our lives! It’s not the black man up on Capitol Hill! He’s just one man! It’s not Joe marrying Johnny or Susan marring Sally! And it’s certainly not mandating tougher gun laws! It was removing you!
Lord, the American people need to hear from you! We need to hear from the God that got this American party started. We’re a young nation. And we’re making our fair share of mistakes. But, Lord, the biggest mistake we have made thus far was removing you!
I’m praying for my country. I’m asking you for your mercy upon me and my country. I’m asking you God to show us how to repair our relationship with you. I’m asking you to forgive the arrogance of the American people. I’m praying that you will do a historical roll call in their minds and in their hearts. I’m asking Lord that they remember the blood that was shade for our freedoms; and how you fought along the men that were fighting for all to be freed men and women. I’m asking you to remind them that our ancestors came here to freely worship you. I’m asking you to remind them this country was born from a divine dream and supported and encouraged by spiritual God.
For George Santayana once wrote, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” And in Numbers 14:26-38 people perished and wondered in the wilderness because they had lost faith in you and your abilities to create a new land for a people of promise. Lord, help the country that I love. Heal the heart of this country because America is a land of promise and we are a people of promise.
A young woman told her mother about her life and how things were so hard. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed that as one problem was solved, a new one arose.
Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.
In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She then pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.
Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me, what do you see?”
“Carrots, eggs, and coffee,” she replied.
She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.
The daughter then asked, “What does it mean, Mother?”
Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity — boiling water — but each reacted differently. The carrot went in
strong, hard and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.
“Which are you?” she asked her daughter. “When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?”
Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity, do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?
Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart?
Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor of your life. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hours are the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate to another level?
How do you handle adversity? Are you changed by your surroundings or do you bring life, flavor, to them?
This is my second cousin, Felicia Hayes, and my grandmother, Queen Hayes.
I wonder how many people have heard the phrase “do not wear out your welcome.” Hum . . . I first heard the expression from my grandmother when I was young.
Back when I was once a kid, and a know-it-all, it seemed my late maternal grandmother would always say those words to my cousins, my siblings and me. I’m not sure how my family members took her wisdom; but back when I was a child I thought my grandmother was old, uncaring, uneducated, mean-spirited, and truly out of touch with the mental and emotional needs of the young. [chuckle]
I can remember as if it was yesterday sassing her for this or that. But nothing stands out more than the time she would not let me go over to my cousin’s house as often as I wanted. And, sadly, it was late into my adult years before I understood the meaning ‘do not wear out your welcome.’
As I’m looking back on things and reflecting upon how I dismissed her words of caution, I now understand why my life was filled with heartaches.
I hate to admit to myself but I deserved all the bumps I got from being hardheaded; and my self enlightenment really makes me feel foolish about things I had blame on others.
Well, any-who-how . . . It was by divine revelation I found the phrase in the Bible one day. I was shocked! It was amazing to read that God gives his children the same warning!
Seldom set foot in your neighbor’s house– too much of you, and they will hate you. Proverbs 25:17
The message I get from this passage is: don’t be so darn clingy! Get a life! Explore parts of your life without others. Enjoy family when can. And remember a bit of you goes a long ways.
I’m coming to terms with my granny’s wisdom. My grandmother has passed but her words live on. And each day that I live I think about her abrasive and unharness wisdom. I’m learning she was indeed the smartest woman I will ever know and most of all she loved me.
Recently, I purchased a new Amish love story by Kelly Long. She’s a new author for me. But I needed something to read and enjoy during moments of downtime. And the title Lilly’s Wedding Quilt intrigued me. So it was plucked off the shelf and placed into my basket with great anticipation for a romantic adventure. But my limited vocabulary has made it hard for me to enjoy the book. As I reflect upon my frustrations in having to stop reading to look for the meanings of words I probably will never use I find my behavior childish. Honesty, I feel my juvenile outlook during reading this book keeps me stagnant in building my vocabulary. So to keep me interested in reading what seems to be a great novel I have decided to use the words I do not know on Vocabulary Mondays.
obtained,done,made,etc.,bystealth;secretorunauthorized; clandestine: a surreptitious glance.
actinginastealthyway.
obtainedbysubreption;subreptitious.
Word usage in “Lilly’s Wedding Quilt”: “She blinked her eyes, licking surreptitiously at a splat of rain that dripped past her mouth, then spoke the first thing that came to her mind.”
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us;
It’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we’re liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
About a week ago on a Facebook page I follow titled “White Men Who Love Their Black Women” the administrator posted the following:
I over heard a conversation among several White women today and they were talking about a couple of girls that didn’t seem threatening to them when it came to getting men or their boyfriends. Within the conversation they mentioned some things that they knew these girls possessed that made them seemingly, “less attractive”. The 1st notable remark that was made was the fact that one of the girls was heavy set—that almost automatically took her out of the game (according to these women). The 2nd comment was that another one of the girls was “universally unattractive” (according to them NO ONE would ever deem her pretty under anyone’s microscope). But the grand finale of a statement that was made that the last girl was Black—yes BLACK—that was why she didn’t pose a threat . These White women seemed to think that their White skin ordained them to be a peck above Black women getting White men just because they were White. My thing is this: I’m good as any girl of any color and I’ll be damned to think that a girl just being White and me being Black would take me away from even being considered an option of a White guy or for that, White men! Questions? Comments?
Due to time restraints I could not make a comment. So today I sit and write my feelings about the brutal honesty of those that publicly spoke on less threatening women when it comes to them dating and them maintaining marital security.
Love comes in multiple colors with surmountable reasons for loving. Only shallow people with low self-esteem will build outwardly with bitter words for mortar a false wall of security. The women gathered at this loathing banquet walked away more empty before they sat to fellowship. It is clear to see these women are not busy living productive lives. Surely what they say or think about women they consider less than is irrelevant to the cause of women of color progressing in life, personally and professionally.
Let’s speak truth: It is not women of color that seek tanning salons to darken their skin. Our skin tone is a birthright given to all colored women by God genetically. Subjectively, if I had problems with people of African descent I would never tan. The process of tanning would be in such a situation as hypocritical. Because to me non-colored people who have problems with Black people due to darker skin pigmentation are jealous, simple-minded, human beings that should have their mouths tape shut. I am only speaking about non-colored people who dislike for the sake of disliking and using color as a scapegoat. IT IS NOT LOGICAL TO TAN WHEN YOU DESPISE OTHER PEOPLE FOR NATURALLY HAVING WHAT YOU PAY TO ACQUIRE! Suchactions provoke the question why are you making your skin the color of those you hate for having it!
As far as I am concern, I feel all people are beautiful . . .
And Black women do give to the rainbow of love. The only difference between Blacks and non-colored people are skin pigmentation’s. Outside of that! Nothing else is different when it comes to being human.
Sad to write, but unfortunately the White woman who made the harsh comment about Black women was correct based upon social stereotype. Therefore, at this point what is relevant and not irrelevant is how long it will take Black women to realize we must shift the way people think of us. We must show others as single people and as a group that we are worth dating and marrying (outside of our brown skin tones).
Women of color we need to change the dating and marring game to our home courts! We need to learn positive ways to effectively market us as people and a gender race group. We need to help other Black women that slipped through the cracks of life. We need to create dating and marring game plans that potential mates can understand; and in doing so we will inspire all men from all walks of life to crossover and play on our team as boyfriends and husbands. In addition, we need to first seek to understand so we will be understood.
I can only end that dating and marrying should be a personal choice. How a person arrives to dating this person or that person, and, or, marrying this person or that person again is a personal choice.
In my journey I have learned to cross over and date men from other races. To me the equipment all works the same despite hearsay! Laughter!
Have a great day! And remember Black women really do have it going on!
Recently, I purchased a new Amish love story by Kelly Long. She’s a new author for me. But I needed something to read and enjoy during moments of downtime. And the title Lilly’s Wedding Quilt intrigued me. So it was plucked off the shelf and placed into my basket with great anticipation for a romantic adventure. But my limited vocabulary has made it hard for me to enjoy the book. As I reflect upon my frustrations in having to stop reading to look for the meanings of words I probably will never use I find my behavior childish. Honesty, I feel my juvenile outlook during reading this book keeps me stagnant in building my vocabulary. So to keep me interested in reading what seems to be a great novel I have decided to use the words I do not know on Vocabulary Mondays.
Black Women Have It Going On 