Yesterday the struggle was real! OMG! I can not believe I was having withdrawals from being on Facebook. Today is a little better but I still have urges to log into my social media account to see what is currently happening in my friends, family, loved ones and the world. But! I’m not going to give into my desire. Instead, I’m committing to cleaning my kitchen and eradicating my emotions from the baggage of others.
As God would have it I was faced with choices concerning my torn relationship with my grand daughter. She sees me as a negative in her life and never a friend or a person that cares deeply for her and her outcome. My truth telling has hurt her beyond her ability to see logic. As a result, she tell private things about me in order to gain some type of satisfaction in shaming me before others. As if shaming me will fix what really ills her soul. Well any who how . . . . She has drawn her line in the sand and set her boundaries. They are loud and clear. I must and will respect them. With that stated, I don’t think she realize once she made her choices her decisions created choices for me.
I wish her well. At the moment their can never be a point return. Sometimes you must cut the cancer out in order for the body to survive.
Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one. Matthew 6:9 – 13
Heavenly Father thank you for this day we have never seen before. Father God it’s Sunday! Someone will wake up sad because they are lonely. Can you please give them your joy by filling their hearts and minds with your perfect love and perfect peace. Amen
Sometimes it seems there are just two types of women. There are destiny’s darlings, those lucky ones sent into the world prepared and primed for this lifetime — born knowing their destiny. you hear about such women; they always knew they were meant to create, to lead, to mend broken lives or broken bones; to perform, to teach, to guide a thoroughbred to a first-place finish.
Sometimes I wonder if I was born to be a “destiny’s darlings” and life events redirected my choices and I became one of those women Sarah described as “doomed from our kindergarten report cards to go stumbling toward our destiny. Often unfocused and fidgety. Tendency to stare dreamily into space. Side-tracked and scattered. Stubborn! Too sensitive for her own good; feelings easily hurt. However, plays nicely with others.”
As I reflect on a conversation with a young woman I’m in agreeance with Sarah “We’d love to think that our life’s journey is linear, but we stumble in fits and starts on our way to authenticity.”
I’m afraid too many people, including myself, look to others for success proof answers to living a life that only we can design.
He thought he was being cute! But! Whatever! Jeff! What the hell ever! LOL’s!
Jeff and I got on the topic of my personality, last Sunday, as I was clipping coupons and organizing my coupon binders. His description of me helped me understand why I never got along with a lot of my family members.
But! Yes! You read correctly. I have coupon binders. That means I have more than one binder. As a matter of fact I have three binders. And, honestly, I need a fourth binder. But I’m trying to keep my coupons in three binders for now.
However, learning about my personality was a huge burden lifted off my shoulders. I was glad to hear someone describe my personality, because for years I thought there was something wrong with me. For years I tried to fit in molds others had created for me. And for years as I tried to live as others would have me I was so very unhappy.
I’m happy to be an A type personality. And if others don’t like me because of my personality then they can take a long walk off a short pier.
This morning I woke to a spiritual headache. I was so angry with a loved one. They had asked for my help and did not take my advice. Thus, causing them to suffer even more at the hands of those I deemed as snakes.
In my frustration I called a friend. Before she could tell me anything I was complaining about the situation.
I wanted to cry. I thought I needed to cry. But I could not cry. I told my friend “When you are in a den of snakes you walk carefully. You don’t want to step on a snake because they can bite you.”
My friend listened. She was patient despite her hunger. She had just gotten out of bed and was just starting her day.
My friend is one of those people who makes her bed before she leaves her room. She’s a person that takes her shower in the morning as soon as her feet hit the floor. And! Yes! She’s one of those people who gets dress for the day. Afterwards, she makes herself a cup of coffee, a small breakfast and begins cooking dinner. By noon day she has finished all her chores and dinner is ready long before evening mealtime. So my early morning call truly interrupted her schedule; and for that I’m sorry I allowed my emotions to get away from me.
As I vented I realized my intense mood. Then my friend said, “We’re not going to think like that. Don’t think like that.” And the next thing I knew my mood changed for the better. I was calm. My negative thoughts were veering towards positive thoughts. I was happy again. And, as a result, I was open to God and the Universe. My openness brought forth the below fruit of wisdom:
Snakes are sometimes perceived as evil, but they are also perceived as medicine. If you look at an ambulance, there’s the two snakes on the side of the ambulance. The caduceus, or the staff of Hermes, there’s the two snakes going up it, which means that the venom can also be healing. —Nicolas Cage
I first heard the saying “kick rocks” from my husband. He had gotten upset on several occasions with one of his family members. Later he would say, “They can go and kick rocks.” Not wanting to appear ignorant I never asked what the expression meant. Yet from time to time I would use the saying in similar situations.
The other day I posted something on Facebook about me learning of Jodi Arias and a friend commented “Thanks for keeping us updated! Would not wanna b out the loop on this, lol.” I tried to play the comment off as a jokingly jester but truthfully I wanted to tell him to go “F” himself. And had I known the truest meaning for ‘kick rocks’ I would have put the saying as my response.
According to the Urban Dictionary telling someone to go and “kick rocks” has several meanings. And even though there were three meanings each contained basically the same connotations. Apparently telling someone to go and kick rocks mean “fuck off.”