From one man, he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth. Acts 17:26

Hello! From Colorado! We got blue skies! And, I plan to work in my backyard. I need to get my garden beds ready for Spring planting. However, I’m a little concerned about water storage. As we didn’t get that much snow in the high desert this year. So! I’m worried about the powers that be regarding water restrictions. Well enough about my potential garden issues. Let’s talk about bi-racial children, not all, but this particular one.

Parenting is a journey of letting go, but what happens when a child chooses an identity that feels like a rejection of your own?

Most parents of biracial children lead with love, but identity is a personal road. Take my friend, for example. She is African American and has biracial children. Her son identifies as white, and with that choice has come a complete distancing from his mother’s culture. From his dating life to his avoidance of family reunions, the disconnect is deep. He often voices frustration with his mother’s mannerisms, speech, and way of life.

Yet, there’s a curious silver lining: he absolutely adores his Black nieces. He shows up for them in ways he won’t for his mother.

It raises a difficult question that many families face: Is this a rejection of Black culture, or is it a deeply rooted conflict with his mother that has simply taken the shape of a cultural divide? Or perhaps, is it the struggle of a young man trying to find where he fits in a world that often demands we “pick a side”?

While my friend continues to show her love—even bringing him plates of food from the family functions he skips—the middle ground remains elusive. In these moments, all we can do is hold space for the family and hope for a bridge to be built. Let’s pray!

PRAYER

Lord, please disrupt the patterns of this volatile relationship. Guard these parents and children from unhelpful advice and reveal the part each plays in their toxic dynamic. Give them a spirit of honesty to accept themselves and one another. We trust You to supply the plan for cultivating a relationship built on love rather than disdain. Amen