Taboo Tuesdays: Learning to be Happy in Your Skin – Part III

MA Concerned Mom asked:

I have asked my friends and family a million times but nothing works maybe someone can give me something else to try? I have a daughter who is 5 she is half african american half white. She is a beautiful girl but she HATES her color (carmel). Ive tried explaining to her that she is beautiful and no matter what color she is she is beautiful. Ive tried explaining everything to her it dont work! My son is very pale color and she seems to be so jealous of him I even have a hard time getting her to go to her.dads house or family’s cause she dont want to be around “colored” people. Its like she resents them for her color! She often ask who God punished her and made her brown or if she can paint herself white. Please someone have tips? Im out of ideads..

Most often God is blamed for things people don’t like about themselves and or about their unhappy lives.  With such feelings come anger as disappointed hearts cultivate delusional thoughts.  Often when people chose not to believe in God or the belief that there is a universal creator they lack respect for life (self, others and non-human) on many levels.  I hope to convey in the this paragraph that when a person does not like themselves or their life they detach from the very essence of their spiritual being.

It is as if disappointment(s) in life make self-haters feel less human and void of any spiritual understanding.  At least that is how I felt and feel during moments of self-hatred.  With great remorse I must acknowledge the spirit of self-destruction most often comes with the feeling of self-hatred.

Moment of Revelation:  Oh!  My!  God!  If I could use words to describe my life up till this point they would be “I was a runaway caboose.”

Reflecting on my sad past makes me angry!  Very angry!  The mean spirited actions of others set my life on a course of living hell here on Earth!  What happen to me as a child shows the unrestricted boundaries concerning the cruelties of mankind.  Only mean and heartless people would and will make innocent children feel bad for whatever is deem as a social imperfection!  Sad!  Sad!  Sad!  Sad!  Sad!

Really!  Trust me when I write, I am very upset right now!  I am at the brink of tears!  How can people be so cruel to a little person!Taboo Tues Blog Photo

At this moment I feel like Jesus when he went into His temple, tossed over the money changers table and said in Matthew 21:13, “My Temple will be called a house of prayer, but you have turned it into a den of thieves!”  

I believe several times within the Bible the body is reference as a temple.  I know for sure 1 Corinthians 6:19 states “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;”  Therefore, Christ is also concerned about the well-being of human temples because it contains part of the Holy Trinity.  With that stated it is noteworthy to recognize that the human body is considered holy.  Where as if children as well as adults are victimized by others the abuse robs the flesh that is also considered a holy place of its spiritual essence; thus, making wounded souls a den of thieves.

Next time I would like to discuss how wounded souls become thieves.  Until then I wish each and everyone a wonderful day!


The Prayers of Black Women: “Yield Not To Temptation”

Artist Unknown
Artist Unknown

“Just ask the Savior to help you, to comfort, strengthen and keep you. He is willing to aid you, and He will carry you through.”

Are you having a hard time with life these days?  Do you feel like you are traveling your journey alone?  If you answered “Yes” to both questions then the response is ‘Just ask the Savior to help you.’

Every life has ups and downs.  Realize you are just having a down moment.  And understand downtime is base upon a person’s ability or inability to find solutions to change the course of their lives.  But one thing is for sure and note worthy:  When a person has lost hope they are easily tempted, and normally the temptation in hopeless moments takes a person further from the life desired.

Prayer for today:  Lord help those that are having a hard time with life.  Show them your grace is more than enough during this moment of hopelessness.  Lord, prayer is being offered for those that don’t have the spirit to continue on.  Life has beaten them.  So they think and feel.  But, Lord, please make note that a request in being made on their behalf that you give them peace that surpasses all humankind understanding.  Fill in the gaps of their self-proclaimed empty lives with love, peace and most of all understanding.  Help them to see Lord that everyone is tempted in believing they are not the “Bell of the ball.”  Show them Lord how to roll on their backs so they can see the beauty of the blue sky, and show them Lord if they can look up they can get up.  And if they can get up they can enter into the party of life once again and realize they only had a bad dance partner.  Teach them Lord that sometimes in life we must learn how to first dance alone even on a crowed dance floor with couples.

Your Loving Daughter,



When Love Transcend Social Boundaries

Artist:  Unknown
Artist: Unknown

Last Sunday I was pressed to write a prayer for my blog  “The Prayers of Black Women.”  I wasn’t sure of my spiritual request to God; but, I felt my prayer should have been about Black women.

[Please don’t stop reading.  God is working in my life on my misplaced and misguided thoughts, and you will read the transformation soon.]

Any-who-how, I was proud of my “I’m Black and I’m Proud” prayer.  Yet, I desired another persons opinion [preferably a black person].  So, I asked my son to come and proofread the prayer I had written.

Again, please don’t stop reading.  God is working in my life on my misplaced and misguided thoughts about what it truly means to be a Black woman; and believe me when I write, my transformation is coming soon.  Sooner than I expect!


For the past couple of days my soul has been unease about the image I’m projecting as a woman of color.

In my personal life I have an array of friends from all walks of life.

With great remorse, I have notice when I write I come across as a person of color that do not like people from other race groups.  The image I’m projecting is totally the opposite of my character.  Totally!  And if you keep reading you will soon see God is getting ready to transform the way I have been thinking and writing lately.

Dialogue between me and my son:

Me:  Can you please proofread my prayer?

My Son:  Hum.  Hum.  Okay.  (My son does not like to get involved in my writing projects.  So I was shocked when he said he would help me.)

Me:  So what do you think?

My Son:  If I came across your blog I would not read it.

Me:  Why?  [I was shocked at his bluntness.]

My Son:  Because it doesn’t have anything that could help me.

Me:  Of course not!  It’s a blog for Black women!

My Son:  Isn’t this about prayer?

Me:  Yes.  But it is a prayer for Black women.

My Son:  Shouldn’t prayer be for everyone?

Me:  [Speechless.]

Lesson Learned:

As a former seminar student I recently realized several pitfalls of racism.

In 1 Corinthians 15:31, Paul writes, “For I swear, dear brothers and sisters, that I face death daily. This is as certain as my pride in what Christ Jesus our Lord has done in you.”

Though I am on a spiritual sabbatical, I am an ambassador for Christ; therefore, my color, race, culture, and personal beliefs outside of Christianity should die daily.  But as it was, after finding myself upset with narrow-minded people I began a blog for Black women despite the need to encourage everyone.

Please understand, I am not a racist, my heart grieves for my race.  With such sorrow I find myself disappointed with a group of people who keep allowing themselves to fall prey to the cruelties of society.  My mind can’t grasp why these beautiful men and women continue to be mentally and emotionally castrated.   It is painful to belong to a race and sit idle as it implode.  Hosea 4:6 says, “My people perish for the lack of knowledge.

And because I don’t want my people to perish, sadly, my gender and my race became my cause to write.  When in my case it should have been man’s inhumanity to man who made me want to make a difference by putting into action “the pen is mightier than the sword.”  Because at the end of the day when all has been said and done we are still humans in need of love despite, race, color, culture, personal beliefs, personal choices, professional choices, religious choices, age and gender.

Until humankind understand that life without love and acceptance is all for not.  We will continue to overlook the most important thing to remember about living:  and that is when love transcend social boundaries it makes people do the right thing.  In 1 Corinthians 13:2-7 Paul writes the below about love:

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.